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Wednesday, February 3, 2010

Boaz and Buddy-makin friends

Boaz and Stonewall have always been best friends. They are only 16 months apart. They did everything together. There were certain things that only Stonewall could do with Boaz, they were buddies. But, with Boaz gone it has left quite a hole in Stonewalls life. Sometimes I think he must feel lost. He has grown a little closer to a few friends though. Boaz and Gracie were little together,and played constantly. Of course, a little fighting too, like here they're fighting over the toys. Hunter joined in this time with their game.Boaz and Stonewall worked together well too. Very cute. Boaz loved his pockets and I even had to start checking them before washing. I usually found a small derringer gun or a rubber glow in the dark snake!!  Building houses for their "animals".This is the Saturday before we had to take Boaz in to the hospital. I knew in my heart something was wrong, but never dreamed what it was. I even believed it was serious, but we never guessed it. As I got to, and left the doctors office on Monday I told the Lord, "Lord, he's always been yours, and if you take him now, you are still gracious and kind. And no matter what, you are still on the throne". I really felt then that he would take him, but as time wore on and he started getting better, I began to believe I was going to get to keep him. But it looks like God took me up on it. I don't like it, don't think I do. I miss him every single day, in ways only a Mommy can understand who has lost one. Some things do remain though, no matter how I feel. My God is still in control, even when I don't understand. 
Stonewall was being a little gentleman this day. It was sooo cute watching him pull his little brother and a girl in the wagon.                    
Here's Sissy snuggling with her little brothers. They loved it and so does she. Stonewall took over Boaz' bed in Sissy's room, but he really likes to sleep with his Sissy and steal her blankets!!! : )  Gracie climbed up and was feeding Boaz his yogurt, though I have no idea why. It was very cute. Just the kind of thing friends do! When Boaz got sick, even the little ones seemed to realize our days with him were a gift. We didn't want to give him everything he wanted, but we all realized God could take him at any time.Stonewall loved his "Buggy". He didn't understand at all. He has seen him feeling so bad that I think he just thought he was sleeping or still sick. He wanted to know if Boaz wanted to color, and gave him toys!So, one day we realize Gracie and Stonewall have taken up together since Boaz passed. We overheard them talking too. Gracie said, "Now that Silas is gone and up in the clouds we'll just have to do with each other". And they really do a lot together.  They are playing house, obviously the kitten is the "baby". Stonewall had been "babysitting" while Grace "fixed dinner".Here's Stonewall and Cheyenne, they play together pretty good, though sometimes Stonewall acts like......well.....he's such a boy!!! He can be cute and be feeding her pretzels one minute. But then the he turned around and stepped on her blanket, smiling the whole time. Chy though is letting Stonewall have it!!  : )  One time Chy decided to wrestle with him. Stonewall again is laughing (he's used to wrestling with his brothers), but Chy was NOT!! She could not get out of this one! It took a few minutes for Alex to be able to settle her. Really, I didn't teach him to wrestle with girls.   ; )                                           I sure miss my little man. Some days I miss him more than others. Some days are much worse than others. I am very glad that Stonewall has friends to help fill in that empty space I know is in his heart also. The other night in church Stonewall raised his hand and asked prayer, he said, "please pray for Silas, because................" and he bawled. Yes, even at four years old there is a large empty space that hurts. He comes to me, sometimes several times in a day to tell me things he remembers about Boaz, like "Buggy called me Tonewall". I guess he must have days that are harder than others too. Stonewall and Boaz were best friends and I'm glad his memory of Boaz is so sharp. I want it to stay that way.  : )        

5 comments:

  1. It is so wonderful to know that Silas was loved so much by his family...especially touching is the little heart of Stonewall. So tender. What a blessing to have such a soft heart. Blessings to you Karen!

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  2. I wish I knew him personally. He was such a little character. I love how Stonewall calls him Buggy. Thank you for sharing pictures Karen. They are so sweet.

    Elsie

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  3. i cry for you and what you are going through. i cry for your children. for your husband.

    but i also pray. HARD.

    buggy. that is completely precious! keep writing. i LOVE hearing about him!

    love,
    marsha

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  4. That was such a good post momma Karen, it made me cry. Silas was such a good little boy and there is not a day that goes by where I don't think of my little blood brother. I am just looking forward to that day when I will see him again. I pray for you everyday that God will feel that empty space in your life and in little buddys life and thank u for letting me have apart of silas life... Thanks for posting that up... Love u momma Karen :)

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  5. There is not a time you have posted about Boaz that I don't get tears in my eyes, and my heart. Keep writing about him, and never forget those precious moments!!

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